Are You Ready to Change? Understanding the Stages of Change in Therapy

How to Know If It’s the Right Time for Therapy

There are many reasons we delay seeking support—even when we know we’re struggling. Sometimes, the idea of reaching out to a friend or family member feels vulnerable enough, let alone contacting a therapist. While societal stigma around mental health is (thankfully) decreasing, other, less visible barriers often remain—like fear, shame, or simply not knowing where to begin.

Some people come to therapy with a clear sense of what’s causing their distress and a strong desire to dive in, even knowing the work will be emotionally challenging. Others might feel a vague sense that something isn’t right, but can’t quite put their finger on it—or worry they can’t be helped. Both experiences are valid.

One helpful concept in the therapy world is Motivational Interviewing (MI)—a collaborative, client-centered approach designed to help people explore their ambivalence about change. At its core, MI is simply a guided conversation about what matters to you and how you might begin to shift your life in a meaningful direction (Miller & Rollnick, 2009).

A big part of this process involves understanding the Stages of Change—a model that outlines how we move through change over time. Identifying where you are in this cycle can help you understand your readiness for therapy or other forms of support.

The Stages of Change

Each stage below includes reflection questions to help you explore where you might be right now:

1. Pre-Contemplation: "I'm not thinking about change yet."

• Am I experiencing a high level of distress?

• Is this distress taking up a lot of my mental energy?

• Is it affecting my day-to-day functioning?

2. Contemplation: "I’m starting to think about change."

• What are the pros and cons of making this change?

• How might my life improve if I took a step forward?

• What values do I hold that connect to this area of my life?

3. Preparation: "I’m getting ready to make a change soon."

• What are my personal goals related to this change?

• What might a realistic plan look like for me?

• Who or what can support me through this process?

4. Action: "I’m actively working on changing."

• What new habits or behaviours am I practicing?

• How am I reinforcing these changes in my daily life?

• What am I noticing about how I feel during this process?

5. Maintenance: "I’m maintaining the progress I’ve made."

• What obstacles could throw me off course?

• How can I prepare for challenges ahead?

• What supports can help me stay consistent?

So—Where Are You Now?

Many people start therapy during the preparation stage, but even if you’re still in contemplation, counselling can help. Feeling stuck doesn’t mean you're failing—it just means there’s something important getting in the way. A therapist can walk alongside you as you explore what’s holding you back and gently guide you toward momentum and meaningful change.

No matter where you’re starting from, you don’t have to figure it all out alone.